The Randomness of the Corner

I am random. This blog is random.
Feel free to observe my randomness. enough said.

pretentiouslimericks:

jackdonnellys:

can you imagine what would happen if arthur weasley discovered google 

The Harry Potter books are set in the early 90’s. I bet that he discovered the Internet around 2000, and was captivated. He probably spent years getting the Ministry to adopt wi-fi, and now he spends his lunch breaks perusing Wikipedia. At home he has a state-of-the-art computer rig with like four massive monitors and he marathons “How It’s Made” on Netflix.

(Source: chrlspratts, via takeme-toyourgrave)

godtie:

it’s really funny bc like listening to english majors talk about their classes or projects theyre really articulate and they use complex words and stuff and it’s very prestigious sounding and then you listen to science majors and if theyre just talking amongst themselves it sounds more like “yeah i put the compound in the thing and honestly i was hoping for a little boom but all i got was a sizzle i dont know what i did wrong.”

(via squarelogic)

dutchster:

heydiddlehiddleston:

does your brain ever just produce disturbingly violent thoughts out of nowhere
like terrible, horrible, thoughts
for no reason at all
and then you snap out of it and you’re like 
i don’t want to kill my mom
what the fuck

(via losingfitz)

little-smartass:

Whenever I watch Spock’s “live long and go fuck yourselves” scene in the first reboot movie I mourn the fact that Kirk wasn’t present because his reaction would have been gold like can we have an au where he was and is just there in the background like

image

(via queerboochananbarnes)

soaringrachel:

sea-change:

they also went to the louvre together to, like, check out the dicks on statues for comparison just to calm scott the fuck down.
(i can just picture them, scott being his usual neurotic self, and ernest just like, ‘give me strength. are you fucking kidding me? i nearly died in the war. i have a fucking medal of bravery. and we’re looking at cocks together. gatsby can only take you so far, my friend. you better write another goddamn masterpiece soon.’)


#the long version of this story is actually much better #because scott asks hemingway to have lunch with him and the first thing he says to hemingway when they’re there is ‘so you know how i’ve … #…never slept with anyone but zelda’ #hemingway is like #…what #scott says so i was fighting with zelda the other day and she told me i wasn’t …adequate #hemingway is like … #…OH #he says: scott let’s go into the men’s bathroom #they go into the men’s bathroom #they come out of the men’s bathroom #hemingway says scott you are PERFECTLY FINE #scott is all B BUT WHY WOULD ZELDA SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAAAAAT #hemingway just. does not comment on zelda fitzgerald. #(that’s a fucking lie hemingway comments so hard on zelda fitzgerald) #scott says WELL I STILL FEEL BAD #hemingway says OKAY FRIEND HERE IS WHAT WE ARE GOING TO DO #WE ARE GOING TO GO TO THE LOUVRE #AND YOU CAN LOOK AT ALL THE COCKS YOU WANT #OKAY???? #scott is like #…sniffle #okay #they go to the louvre #scott feels even worse #hemingway kind of sees his point #he says ‘look scott do you want me to just give you some fucking tips’ #scott says yes #hemingway gives him some tips #which according to his memoirs include ‘the trick with the pillow’ #and much much more #and well zelda and scott stayed married

soaringrachel:

sea-change:

they also went to the louvre together to, like, check out the dicks on statues for comparison just to calm scott the fuck down.

(i can just picture them, scott being his usual neurotic self, and ernest just like, ‘give me strength. are you fucking kidding me? i nearly died in the war. i have a fucking medal of bravery. and we’re looking at cocks together. gatsby can only take you so far, my friend. you better write another goddamn masterpiece soon.’)

(Source: fishsticksbitch, via queerboochananbarnes)

textsfromrotg:

(319):You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.

textsfromrotg:

(319):

You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.

beitae:

"Ain’t nobody ever gonna care about you except me, little brother."

PLEASE DON’T REPOST, DON’T RE-EDIT. THANK YOU.

(via daishannigans)

wandaventham:

i just realized that fucking ross geller got tenure in the field of paleontology at, like, age 30? and must’ve been hired at that tenure track position in his mid-20s? how was he so young? how old was he when he got his PhD? did he just… get a job after graduating without even doing a postdoc? is this what the 90s were like? fuck the 90s. fuck ross geller. fuck the way rachel got that coffee shop job with no experience

(via f0rtytw0)

queerboochananbarnes:

izzymar:

dorkch0ps:

gunsounds:

prettyboyshyflizzy:

happened to me the other day im like damn its a 20 relax shawty

aint nobody tryna lose their job for a fake ass bill

^^^

WE ARE REQUIRED TO DO THIS. 

Literally everywhere I worked, we were required to check every bill larger than a ten. Since we didn’t know who was a secret shopper or someone from corporate, we follow the rules coz cashiers can lose their jobs if a counterfeit bill turns up.

queerboochananbarnes:

izzymar:

dorkch0ps:

gunsounds:

prettyboyshyflizzy:

happened to me the other day im like damn its a 20 relax shawty

aint nobody tryna lose their job for a fake ass bill

^^^

WE ARE REQUIRED TO DO THIS. 

Literally everywhere I worked, we were required to check every bill larger than a ten. Since we didn’t know who was a secret shopper or someone from corporate, we follow the rules coz cashiers can lose their jobs if a counterfeit bill turns up.

(Source: onlytwitterpics)